This is a very old article. Maplin is no more.
I detest queuing or being messed around…
Start here -> Irritation Level: 0
Yesterday, I nipped into a huge Wyevale Garden Centre down in Hampshire. I grabbed a trolley and piled on to it four sacks of compost from the pallets lined up outside. I saw a large sign which said ‘Entrance’ and made my way towards it. When I got there I saw a smaller sign which said ‘No Entry’ and realised the the ‘Entrance’ sign had an arrow on it pointing to the opposite end of the building (the arrow was hidden until you got there due to the door being recessed into the building). Irritation Level -> 3 .
I turned round and walked down to the other door. The path had a slight sideways slope and the trolley was a little wayward. Irritation Level -> 3½ .
I walked into the entrance and looked for a checkout. Nothing – it just looked like a greenhouse. Oh, wait! There’s a sign which says ‘Sales’. I look through and it is as empty as this area except for sheds and other garden stuff. Irritation Level -> 4 . I am standing in the middle of a triangle of three members of staff who are talking to each other:
Excuse me, but where do I pay?
Oh! You have to go all around [points around the back of the building]. People normally pay first and then pick up what they want outside. Irritation Factor: 6 .
It doesn’t matter. I’ll walk round. It’s this way?
No. It’s all the way around. People normally pay first [points out the front near the pallets] . Irritation factor -> 8 .
So I walk out the ‘entrance’ and back towards the ‘non-entrance’. I stubbed my toe on the wayward trolley’s wheel and I could see absolutely no way of being able to pay for this stuff out here. Irritation Factor -> 10 .
I dumped the trolley and drove off. Won’t be going back there – or to any Wyevale Garden Centre – ever again on a point of principle. I know damned well this is some moron’s idea to get people to walk through the entire garden centre to entice them to pick up things they don’t want before they get to the checkout. All I wanted to do was hand over my £20-30, get my change, and go. Quickly.
Then I got home. I was intending to go straight to Maplin to buy a cordless soldering iron (need to do some soldering under the bonnet of the car and my electric soldering irons are for fine electronic work, not melting huge globs of solder). I got home during rush hour and thought better of it, so I waited until after 7pm and then drove the 5 miles or so to the store. Irritation Factor -> 1 .
After selecting the device I wanted I went to the checkout – the store has three checkouts, but it is rare to have more than one manned at the same time, especially this time of the day. There was one customer at the checkout paying for something. Irritation Factor -> still 1 (I’m not that bad).
As I got there another staff member came up with a mobile. He starts frantically dialling numbers and not getting answers. Irritation Factor -> 4 .
It becomes clear the customer is there with his wife and three kids. The kids are playing with things in a way guaranteed to damage them, and the mother is doing nothing to stop them. Irritation Factor -> 5 .
I notice the member of staff is holding a credit card whilst dialling out. Irritation Factor -> 8 .
I wait. And wait. And wait. It is obvious the credit card transaction is going to fail or not go ahead for some reason – even to me, and I can’t hear anything that is being said. Irritation Factor -> 8½ -> 9 -> 9½ -> 10 .
I dumped the items I’d picked up and walked out the store. I will be going back again – Maplin is too important to boycott. If there’s a problem with the merchant banking system it’s probably not their fault, but they could do something about only ever having one till manned, though. Having said that, something I ordered by mail from them arrived within two days last week, and people who go into stores to buy a loaf of bread and then use a bloody debit card are pond life anyway, so I may be going back to mail order instead of visiting their store quite as much.
Or maybe not. It’s like Aladdin’s Cave in that place!