Too Stupid for Words (or a Licence)

This classic yarn is covered by The Guardian. Also in the Daily Mail.

Hadi Mohammed had failed his test five times, so he got Derbas Hamed (who had a full licence) to take the test for him. Mohammed is a former Iraqi police officer.

What happened was this:

  • Hamed drove to the test alone
  • He took the test as Mohammed, but failed with 16 faults
  • Suspicious staff called the police

The article says:

When the police interviewed Mr Hamed at first he gave his name as Mr Mohammed but when he was arrested he confessed. When Mr Mohammed was also arrested he said he had been too tired to take the test.

I love this part. The usual idiotic mitigation spiel by Mohammed’s lawyer:

My client did not actively commit the deception and played a secondary part.

It was an extremely unsophisticated fraud, ridiculously unsophisticated and amateurish. He got nowhere near succeeding and is thoroughly ashamed.

Utter bollocks. He had every hope that it would succeed, but was too stupid to realise it probably wouldn’t the way he was doing it. The frightening thing is that with a few tweaks it could easily have worked. The lawyer adds:

Since coming to this country from Iraq he is desperate to find work and needs a driving licence.

Exactly.That’s why he did it. It’s the only reason: it was for his benefit.

Even better is the Recorder’s summing up:

This is a very serious offence and had you both been successful a completely unqualified driver and not a very good one at that would have been let loose on the roads.

This would have meant a danger to other road-users and only a custodial sentence is justified. I do not accept Mr Hamed’s contention that he failed the test deliberately.

So Hamed reckoned he failed deliberately! I wonder how much he was paid?

Mohammed was jailed for two months, and Hamed (already with form for fraud whilst impersonating someone for the theory test) for three.

You couldn’t make it up, could you?

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